Sunday, November 7, 2010

The Daily Awkward Annoyance.

I live in a townhouse. In downtown Chattanooga, Tennessee. I love my house. I love my roommates. Literally, I love everything about where I live. EXCEPT. The couple that lives on the other side of my bedroom wall. Every night, like clockwork I hear the same fight,

Girl: WHY WHERE YOU TEXTING THAT GIRL?!!!?!!?!?!?!
Boy: Baby, she texted me, you can look, I didn't even text her back!
Girl: YEAH RIGHT YOU PROBABLY DELETED THE TEXTS ALDJFLKASDJFLKDFHFH RAHHHHH AHHHHH BLAHHHHH GRRRRR I HATE YOU ALDJFLKAJSDLFKJDS
Boy: Fine, whatever, I'll leave!

Thank God for me right? Because now, he's leaving at 2 am, and I can finally go to sleep in peace.... oh wait.... he's back.... 2 hours later....

Girl: Okay baby, I'm sorry I overreacted, I just love you so much and you know I have trust issues...
Boy: it's okay I know, I'll try harder (cough cough BULLSHIT cough cough)
Girl: I just really think that we should be spending more time together...
(there was her first mistake...)
Boy: ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME RIGHT NOW?!@!!!@@@@ WE SPEND SO MUCH G** D*** TIME TOGETHER THAT IT MAKES ME SICK, I'M OVER HERE EVERY FUCKING NIGHT BLAHHH BLAHH RAHH GRRR

one hour later...

make up sex. her headboard backs up on my wall. enough said.

So, that's my life, in a nutshell, from the hours of 2am to 4am Monday to Friday.

The best part is, seeing them come home happy and lovey dovey every afternoon... but little do they know, in just a few short hours, they will both be letting the fiery devils that live inside of them come out and rip each others faces off. If only they knew that little ole Savannah was listening to their relationship slowly deteriorate one night at a time.....


Before I start to take you on my epic journey....

There are a few things you need to know about me. I literally live the most awkward life. At least one thing happens to me a day where I have to stop and say to myself "why me?" The thing is, I'm not sure why me, but in most instances, whether I deserve it or not, I seem to get the sort end of the stick. I think that it is now time for the world to be exposed to my usually-every-day life, which normally turns out to be completely hilarious. I'm going to write on here everyday, and hopefully get a few laughs out of it. Truth is, I need a hobby, and why not let everyone in on what I like to call, my perfectly hilarious, awkward life. I hope you enjoy.